Sunday, August 25, 2013

Tube time times a zillion ...

Dear Diary,
I watch so much TV right now.

"How I Met Your Mother": This is probably my favorite sitcom of all time. I can't think of one with more continuity, more humor or more cleverness.

But here is where I'm a hypocrite: I saw a guy wearing a Dunder Mifflin shirt the other day and assumed he was every synonym for douche bag presently listed in the Urban Dictionary. I think at one point I thought "The Office" was funny. Then humans broke "The Office" by always, always saying "That's what she said ..." and buying "The Office" swag. Mugs, T-shirts. Suddenly "The Office" was not "The Office," it was just the breeding ground for quotes, plots, pranks that would already be worn out by lunch break the following day. Ugh.

So when I quote Marshall or Barney or try to dress like Lily or sing "Bang, bang, bangity, bang" or otherwise ape the crew from "How I Met Your Mother" I reveal myself to be a total asshole.

"Melrose Place": I think I covered this one pretty thoroughly here. But since that post, the drama has shifted into that "Nip/Tuck" zone, identified as a place where you won't be surprised if a character busts out his Home Circumcision Kit. My favorite moment: Dr. Kimberly Shaw returns, she's not actually dead, and cozies up again to her former fiance Dr. Michael Mancini. Not because she loves him, no, because she wants to kill him. Probably because beneath that sheath of gorgeous red wig, her skull looks like a baseball.

To this end, she steals Jane Mancini's car, dons another wig -- this time it's a blonde bob, the signature look Jane shares with Chynna Phillips -- and runs down Michael in the street in front of the hospital. When he comes to, he believes it was Jane who tried to kill him and never suspects that it is his girlfriend in a Jane disguise.

Gah. It's so good.

"Girls, Season 2" I think this show has either been dismissed or lauded, depending on your opinion of Carrie Bradshaw et al., as a hipster "Sex and the City" when, honestly*, it has more in common with "Louie." Especially around mid-season when Hannah and Jessa go upstate to the latter's father's place, both to decompress from recent hiccups. There is a slo-mo linear story to it, more short story style, that bucks the sitcom trend of: 1. Problem! 2. Chaos! 3. Problem Solved. 4. Hug. Also: This show is so goddamn funny I can't hardly take it. Also, also: Hannah's very purposeful use of her body as a vessel of yuck (slivers in butt, wax in ears) is so Japanese body horror. I wish Lena Dunham all the big dumb giant awards in the world.

"The Newsroom": The first episode of this HBO series set in a cable TV newsroom is super-duper exciting and really dresses journalism in its sexiest duds. Asshole celebrity anchor, his ex-girlfriend hired to produce his program, BREAKING NEWS. It's a real ballbuster. You've got a strong cowboy male, a fiery woman, interesting background characters. Then: Episode Two. That fiery woman becomes a simpering idiot who can't figure out how to use email and regularly interrupts news meetings to air grievances related to this long dead relationship. She continues to be an idiot through the rest of the season. But don't worry, the other women on the show are stupid, too. The cub female reporter also interrupts work for boy talk.

I'm not convinced that this one would pass the Bechdel Test. At least not on every episode. Don't any women write for this show? Has Aaron Sorkin ever opened his door and took a deep breath of post-1970s air?

"Game of Thrones, Season 2": I'm not so much watching this as sitting in the same room as Chuck watches and occasionally glancing at the TV just in time to see a part severed from the greater body area. Although I saw Season One, so I know enough about what is going on that Chuck can explain things to me as they get progressively meatier.

Honorable Mention
"Revenge, Season 1" I spent a day half-assed marathoning this show about a young rich woman's attempt to avenge her father's incarceration/death. Her targets: A bunch of "Dynasty-esque" assholes living in the Hamptons.

"Ally McBeal," I watched just long enough to wonder whether Calista Flockhart's lips are natural and to remember she was famous for short skirts, dancing baby hallucinations and having a head that was disproportionate to her small frame.

* I hope you heard that "Honestly?" in Hannah's voice, because she says that ALL THE TIME


Beret said...

Are you new to HIMYM? You will grow to hate it (I hope you don't, but you will). Just thinking of that stupid Bang Bang song makes my skin crawl. Believe me, I loved it for years but it turns like milk turns bad. :(

Christa said...

Did you just get sick of it? I'd never seen it until a few months ago. I've watched all but this past season.

tawnylaquay said...

HIMYM should have ended on a high note, still hanging on like a desperate ex-gf. Damn.

GIRLS - love GIRLS. I actually cheered during the season finale. Then I cried.

amy a. said...

I never got hooked into HIMYM. I catch a half a season once every year? Still waiting to see Girls Season 2 - and The Newsroom does not pass the Bechdel test. They are all assholes, so there's that in common. Still interesting to watch because of Sorkin's writing - mostly for the entertainment of seeing the actors move those combinations of words around.