Introduction ...

At about the mid-point of Tina Fey's autobiography "Bossypants" I lost that dewy baby chicken fluff of naivety and had a realization: It must be very easy for a celebrity to write her own story. Before Tina Fey pounded her first space bar on the old typewriter, she knew that she had an audience of teetering primetimers who would be satisfied with a few chuckles, a childhood photo featuring a shag haircut and couple of anecdotes starring Alec Baldwin that were exclusive to this flavor of book glue.

Easy peasy.

With that in mind, I've decided to start a new feature on this blog: The Monday Memoir. Using Tina Fey's book as a template, I'm going to write my autobiography. Each post will be triggered by a chapter of her book, either using the same first few words or an idea she sparks. I won't always post it on Monday.  Maybe I'll never post it on a Monday. I just love alliteration. And puns. Mostly puns. 

For the record: I actually think "Bossypants" is a riot. In fact, I wasn't going to buy it. I was just going to steal the words with my eyeballs in-store (like I did with half of Snooki's novel). But I just cracked up one too many times to put it back on the shelf. This made the man in stained sweatpants who brought his own blanket to the store look at me like I was crazy.

My cover:

Consider this the introduction. I'll be done with this project in 20 some chapters, or when I say my safe word: "Uncle."