Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Bulls eye ...

Welcome to my blog where I write about my body. Every day.  Every headache, eye twitch and lodged poppy seed that I encounter, and how they make me feel -- both mentally and physically. It's really the only reason I can come up with for writing on the internet these days. My body.

Today I drank a Red Bull because I was thirsty and it was free. I'm not a huge fan. Mostly I think drinking Red Bull always tastes like drinking poison from the future. It's that weird metallic mix of -- I don't know -- roofies and Drakkar. There is something really "Terminator" about it. 

I don't expect things labeled "energy drink" to actually provide any sort of change in temper, mood or activity level. I simply expect them to hasten death in ways we haven't found out how to pronounce yet. I was so wrong that I actually regret not having a term paper that I need to finish tonight.

Three hours later that stuff hit me in a can't-stop-dancing way, and sent me into a world where sentences don't have periods. I was so mad! That was so funny! Is it hot in here? I CAN FINALLY DO THE ROGER RABBIT! Waving mammoth leaves of collard greens like palm branches: Me, coconut bra girl, you loin cloth boy in aviators!

These were probably the optimal conditions to watch "Hot Tub Time Machine." Which we did.

3 comments:

Futbol said...

let me guess: you later spilled some red bull on toonses and swooshed back to the early 1980s so you could get famous for singing "borderline" before madonna got around to it.

Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm said...

Lately, I've been drinking 4 x 16 oz Monster Lo-Carbs a day. I'm a fucking mess.

Mach1 said...

"Like poison from the future" is a far better way to describe Red Bull than my own chosen characterization - liquid Smarties.