Do I hate it? Or do I love it?
SOME FACTS ABOUT RUNNING OUTSIDE
1. I run faster, but ...
2. I can't run as far.
3. One time a little girl looked at me and said to her parents "He's sweaty."Now I have to wear my sports bra on the outside of my long-sleeved T's.
4. One time I passed a group of three college-aged boys walking with a basketball. Then, at my turnaround, I passed them again. Then, when I got to my quitting point, they caught me. This makes me think I could have just walked.
5. Today Chuck said that I smelled like Lake Superior. He assured me that this was a good thing. [But what does the largest freshwater urinal smell like anyway? Don't answer that.]
6. I have yet to hit runner's zen while running outside. That part where Girl Talk moves my legs for me like I'm Girl Talk's marionette.
7. My arms swelled up so much that I couldn't remove my watch afterward.
THINGS I WISH ABOUT RUNNING
1. That I was a chipper morning runner, hurdling recycling bins and sneaking sips of coffee from the travel mugs of businessmen waiting for the bus. [While the Laverne and Shirley Theme Song played, if I'm allowed to be picky.]
2. That, only when running, I lived in a neighborhood as flat as the aforementioned high school girl of yore.