i made a grave error in not cleaning out the refrigerator before we went to los angeles. when we got back, it smelled like it had been moonlighting as an outhouse at oz-fest.
we could have grown sunflowers in that compost heap of rancid peppers, wilted scallions and liquified lettuce. beyond that, it was like a time capsule: ruinous jars of salsa, marinara, veganese ...
i dumped all of these things into a giant, sealed bowl, so that if the bag busted open before it got to the garbage can, it wouldn't look like i'd had back alley liposuction.
"would monsieur like some veganese with his pineapple salsa and olive marinara sauce?"
the finished product was too satisfying to go undocumented. we filled it with only new, unsullied food stuffs with expiration dates far, far into the future.