Friday, May 2, 2008

homegrown night five: i'm holding out for a gyro ...

* chuck cooed a magic word on wednesday: gyro.
* visions of plucky little spiced lambs danced in my head. gyro, gyro, gyro.
* i called niko's in superior to make sure they were still open, assuming from the nonanswer that they were getting slammed. why would they be closed at 8:30 p.m. on a wednesday? gyros know no quitting time. gyro, gyro, gyro ...
* he called me 25 minutes later from the walgreen's parking lot. closed.
* just like the game big buck hunter, my craving lay bloody and bleeting on simulated grass.
* he came home with butter burgers and cheese curds from culvers. culvers should never finish second place in a taste-off. no one puts culvers in the corner.
* thursday we went to the mall, home depot, and through all the 3 dollar sale shirts and potted herb plants, all i could think about was a world coated in tzatziki sauce and that i am a life-sized tongue, lapping paths of its saucy goodness.
* this time i crossed the bridge to superior, winds strong enough to flip my civic into the lake. fortunately, i have at least an added 75 pounds of debris in my back seat to keep me safe.
* the dude in front of me at niko's gets the last gyro. honestly. they ran out of gyro meat one construction worker too soon.
* "i'm as surprised as you," the woman working the cash register said. she seemed pleased to disappoint me, and didn't find my story about how we had been holding out for an gyro for two nights.
* "huh," she responded emotionless.
* turns out the chicken version is a fine substitute.

* the night starts at burrito union. my first experience watching the lake superior cacophonic choir, a group that includes chuck when he doesn't a) have pneumonia, b) have to work.
* i snuggle in next to the rockstar, who recently had a new eardrum installed, rendering her unable to play on wednesday's acoustic night. between niko's being closed and not getting to hear my favorite singer, wednesday would have been a complete failure had we not finished season four of 'the wire.'
* the lake superior cacophonic choir's performance exceded its billing.
* then s'fire took over djing, playing greatest hits by bands performing this week.
* the rockstar drove us to the twins bar for hip hop night. rumor had it: it was a rough crowd.
* before we can get out of the minivan, the rockstar says: "wait. i have to put on some lipstick."
* for some reason chuck and i cackle, watching her from outside her van.
* i think it may have something to do with the chester creek pale ale we've been bathing in.

* hip hop night is not a rough crowd. in a notoriously rough bar on a notoriously rough street -- a street i live on, incidentally -- the "rough" status must have come from someone who fears crowds. it is packed. between the baggie jeans, faux camoflague hoodies and cocked hats, it looks like the parking lot of teen night.
* i start to crave sprite.
* it takes approximately a half hour to order a beer, so i order six.
* die(ode) is playing when we get there, and for some reason i'm surrounded by people who understand that this music is not so hot. i'm hardly a great hip hop mind, but they sound fine to me.
* kritical kontact follows, and i'm surrounded by people who understand that THIS music is hot.

* i'm in the bathroom when a woman walks in. "show us your ass!" the other girls yell, and she tugs down the back of her jeans to reveal a new tattoo.

* the image has something to do with her last name.
* she allows me to photograph it and put it on my web site.

* we walk home and eat burritos, which chuck has stocked the freezer with for a moment just like this.


Laurie said...

This is where I flaunt that I live in city with gyros on every corner. And say that yesterday I went to Eat A Pita to pick up my lunch and this hispanic woman and little girl came in asking, "You have YIrose? YIrose, yes?" and the little girl kept saying, "Meeet, meeeet!"
I kept staring at the guy behind the counter, screaming with my eyes, "this is creepy funny, no?" but he wouldn't play.

Whiskeymarie said...

Okay, "holding out for a gyro" is the most clever thing I've read all week.

Have you ever had the chicken gyro's at Z's deli? They're pretty darn good, I must say.